Thursday, May 10, 2012

They Shoot Horses, Don't They?

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together." - Marilyn Monroe
I've been living by that Marilyn Monroe quote for the past few days and weeks. Whenever life seems out of my control, I reassure myself by reading those words and mulling them over in my mind. There has been a lot of falling apart, a lot of bad things, a lot of lies, and a lot of letting go in my life lately and some days are really difficult. Days when listening to Cat Stevens and reading Rod McKuen seem like the only real possibilities. But getting out of bed and doing your work and facing your promises and responsibilities are the reality, and you have to put your bravest face on and deal with what's ahead, making the best of it along the way. Of course this applies in life all the time, but the past few days have been much more difficult than I remember.
I want to make this short and brief so that I can get onto better things. First off, I didn't get the internship. They called me two hours prior to my start time and told me that I didn't have all the necessary qualifications and wouldn't be able to complete all the tasks of the intern. This was extremely upsetting. I had really been looking forward to the opportunity. I'm not even angry about it, though. It wasn't meant to be. I'm angry about the way it was handled. They blamed me about it, saying that I should have brought these qualifications up in the interview process. I'm glad that I'm not working for such immature people afterall, but if there's one thing I hate, it's when people make me feel like a failure and a liar. That is one thing that I am not. I am absolutely not a failure. I am an honest, good person and I take responsibility for my mistakes.
On top of those upsetting feelings, my dog has been sick for the past 3 weeks. After numerous vet visits, the doctor finally said, "There is nothing more we can do here. You have to take him to a specialised vet, and as soon as possible." We asked if Monday would work and she said no, he might not still be here by then. So I spent 5 hours at the vet yesterday and now Moses is there getting an ultrasound and blood work done. It's hard even thinking about losing the little guy. He's been there for me through some of my most trying times and I wasn't prepared to lose that so quickly. I've been praying that he will be okay, but I always have to keep in mind that everything happens for a reason.
So now that I've got you down and depressed....I guess I should cheer you up! The weather is absolutely gorgeous. Sun everywhere and there're rambunctious baby squirrels and birds everywhere. I decided to try out a new photo-spot today and am thinking I'll have to revisit it again.
I bought this dress a year (or even more) ago from H&M, but this is the first time I've worn it. I love it. The skirt is full and perfect for twirling...and who doesn't love a good horse print, huh? (That was a rhetorical question.) I look forward to wearing it more. It would also be a perfect piece to wear during winter, because it's great for layering. All kinds of possibilities and if that isn't something to be cheerful about, I don't know what is!
I definitely had a spring in my step today. I forget how lovely the sunshine and the green grass is. Also, it's one of the first days this month that it hasn't been raining and grey. I can't wait to spend more time outside! One good thing about not getting the internship: I won't be stuck inside a basement with no windows and fresh air.
My aunt gave me this shirt for the internship (I'm so crazy over prints, I don't have a solid white blouse) and it is now one of my favourite tops! It's a very thin material and isn't super fitted, so it falls nicely. I think I've worn it 3 of the past 5 days. My aunt also gave me a pair of brown shorts which make me feel like a girl scout and so naturally I love them. Expect to see those soon!
One change I made this spring was to my hair. I cut my bangs. On accident. It's funny because I made a blog post about very short Bettie Page/Louise Brooks bangs. I had decided not to go forth with them, but ended up accidentally cutting my bangs too short anyways. So now I have them and they're not too bad...but definitely made me realise how messy my eyebrows are! Not a good way to find out that you've overplucked your eyebrows, but change is always good and I haven't changed my hair much lately due to my attempts at growing it out.
I have to scurry off to campus this afternoon to pick up a project, and then I get to see my pup pup after his long day at the vet. He'll need loads of hugs and kisses, and I'm just the girl for the job! Toodles xx


SafiyaMarie said...

Oh gees sounds like you've had a rough time but its great that your not letting it get you down, I'll remember that for future reference. Love the dress, you're right it did cheer me up!


two birds said...

i'm so sorry to hear about your dog and the internship. their loss, is the way i see it. and you will get something even better...i'm sure of it!

Sarah Dee said...

Sounds like its been a rough go but it is good to think you won't have to work with childish people! Keep your chin up and give your pups lots of kisses

<3 Sarah

Laura said...

my thoughts are with you and your dog. i truly hope everything will be okay x

Joy said...

Very sorry to hear about the internship and your pup, I wish you both all the best. Also I'm not usually a huge fan of short fringes (sorry, bangs!) but I think they really suit you & frame your face & compliment your awesome curls!

Keep smiling x

My Gaby said...

Wow1 he amado tus ultimos dos looks! son tealmente hermosos! llenos de colores, los ame!

Ani said...

Sorry you had a rough week, but at least you looked amazing and you're looking on the bright side. PS you're totally pulling off those bangs. I don't think I could.

Anonymous said...

gorgeous! Love your dress

Charlotte. said...

I'm sorry to hear about your dog, I hope everything works out for you!
The dress is so cute, I love that print!

sip-n-wear said...

Love the dress!

Anonymous said...

Well, that's an awful week. It's good that you have such a great attitude about it though. And I really like your dress/shirt combo. The fringe is pretty brilliant as well - I always cut my own fringe, but I'm never brave enough to do an actual difference to it, just a trim.

carrie jade said...

sorry to hear about the internship! that is extremely unprofessional and something they should have double checked themselves beforehand. but you're right, it's good that you won't be working for people like that.

love your love for animal patterns! so cute. :)

Anonymous said...

if it helps you're bangs look so great

Jamie Rose said...

Aw I'm so sorry to hear about your dog being sick and the internship. I hope it all works out for the best!

Despite all that going on you look incredibly cute! I really love the white top layered under your adorable horse print dress.